


Universal Irony

by deadly_poison



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Flash Fic, Short One Shot, extremely minor spoilers for jackady (very very minor idk if it's even a spoiler), shipping-wise this is way milder than canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-03-07
Packaged: 2018-05-25 09:01:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6188380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadly_poison/pseuds/deadly_poison
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chat Noir reveals an embarrassing secret to Ladybug.<br/>[Very minor spoilers for Jackady, not relevant to the episode plot]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Universal Irony

**Author's Note:**

> So, in the newest episode, there is a frame showing Ladybug rescuing a cat. (Yep, that was the spoiler). Why didn't she get Chat Noir to do it? He probably speaks cat or something.

Ladybug threw her yoyo as fast as she could: if the comment an anonymous person on Alya’s blog had left was anything to go by, there was a new villain on the loose. She stopped for a second… Chat Noir was trying to contact her. They hadn’t managed to immediately find the villain, so they’d decided to split up. He probably had already found Hawkmoth’s newest victim.  
“Hello, my Lady.” He grinned through the screen. “You’re as beautiful as always.”  
She rolled her eyes. “Have you found the akumatized person we were warned about?” she asked impatiently.  
“I am afraid no-one was akumatized this time.” With a swift gesture, he showed her a handmade scary costume. “All I found today was a guy wearing this costume, pretending to be evil. He asked me if he could have my autograph as soon as I showed up.” She heard a faint voice under Chat’s “is that Ladybug? Can I have her autograph too?”  
  
She was afraid something like this could happen when the two of them gained popularity. The guy didn’t even have decent sewing skills.  
“So everything is fine.” She sighed tiredly.  
“Uhm, actually… This guy managed to scare a few kids and, well, a cat.”  
“Was that badly-sewn costume too much for you? Do I need to pet you to get you to calm down?” she sassed.  
“I wasn’t talking about _me_ , but now that you mention it I think I need a back rub.” He winked.  
“Get to the point.”  
“Right. Yes. The children are less scared now that I have unmasked this guy” he moved his staff enough to allow Ladybug to see three children chasing his tail, “but the cat climbed on a tree and won’t get back down. Can you come and rescue it?”  
She raised her right eyebrow. It seemed like every superhero had to rescue a cat sooner or later. It was only a matter of time before it happened to her.  
“And you’re not doing it yourself because you want me to take the credit for our first cat-rescue?”  
From the other side of the screen came a nervous laughter.  
“You remember that I am allergic to feathers, right? Well, it’s not the only allergy I have…” Chat Noir was blushing and looking away from the screen, struggling to continue.  
“What? Are you telling me you’re allergic to cats?” it took her a few seconds to catch on. She burst into laughter.  
“I am only allergic to their fur.” He specified. “Every time I get near the cat, I start to sneeze and it runs away scared.”  
“But you _are_ a cat! It makes no sense!”  
  
She was starting to think that the universe (or whoever assigned kwamis) was full of irony. Ladybugs were supposed to be lucky, and yet she managed to bring upon herself the weirdest incidents all the time. Cats were supposed to hunt for pigeons – which Chat Noir was allergic to – and constantly lick their fur – which Chat Noir was allergic to. Maybe he even suffered of insomnia and had a phobia of mice.  
On the other side of the screen, the boy was doing his best to look as offended as possible. He was miserably failing: hearing her laughter always made him smile.  
“I’ll be right there, you big tomcat.”

**Author's Note:**

> So. It's not the first time French cartoons claim my soul or that I want to grab all the leads from said cartoons and hug them. (Hi Code Lyoko. Hello Celestini).  
> Hello, middle school me, looks like we're back in hell.  
> [Usual disclaimer, English is not my first language and I have watched this cartoon in so many languages it's scrambled my brain.]


End file.
